Sunday, January 3, 2016

What It Takes to Make It in Relationships

When it comes to relationships, falling in love, and getting married, there's a whole dating process that most people would like to just skip over after certain age. Having said that, many people enjoy the whole dating period, but usually, they're the types of people that haven't been in the dating scene for all that long. In other words, they're not sick of it like the rest of that general population of singles that are over 35. The truth of the matter is that when you actually meet someone that you like, despite how old you are, and despite how long you've been on the market and in the dating scene, you enjoy dating the person. 

Suddenly, you embrace every date that you go on with this special person, and you have a brand-new outlook towards dating in general. What for so long may have seemed like a hassle, and a waste of time, going along with an endless list of interview-like dating questions, when you find someone that you enjoy dating, you not only don't mind answering those questions, but you might not even notice that they're those very same interview-like questions. Suddenly, you perceive them differently, and they feel like just part of the process, and you can't wait to get to know all about the other person. 

So let's say that you met someone that you like, you start dating, and quickly get into a relationship. You asked a lot of those early, crucial dating questions that needed to be asked, and now you're onto a whole new list of questions, and beyond questions as well. You start to observe and analyze how compatible you are with one another, observing each other's everyday actions, and whether or not you feel happier with that person, as opposed to without them. During early dating, you have to look at a couple factors like if you smile more than you frown, if you laugh with the person enough, and if you generally feel happier with them, as opposed to without them. 

Anyone can jump into a new relationship and just know that they're with someone, and that they're not alone anymore. But, that's never a good reason to get into a relationship, for the fear of being alone. It's important that even when you choose to dive into a new relationship, that you do so with your whole heart, body, mind, and soul. It's important to put in a certain amount of effort into relationships, and that goes for all types of relationships, including friendships. One person should never be doing all of the work in any type of relationship. It takes two people committed to a situation that both equally put in a certain amount of effort, in order for the relationship to be truly successful. 

There are many other factors that one needs in order to have a successful, healthy, happy, and loving relationship. That includes things like trust, honesty, being faithful, being understanding, being respectful, being affectionate, having great communication, being easy-going, giving each other enough personal space that they require or desire, as well as going into the new situation with a decent amount of positivity. In other words, it's imperative that we go into new relationships with a positive outlook, and in a hopeful state of mind. One should never go into a new relationship being pessimistic, or bringing in too many sensitivities, or wounds from their past relationships, or from their past in general. Every relationship that you go into deserves a real chance, and the only way to give that relationship a true, and real chance is to go into it with a healthy, stable, loving, and optimistic mind. 

No one wants to get hurt in a relationship, but it's important to remember one thing. When you choose the person that you want to be in a relationship with, the only way to know if it's going to work is to have an open mind, and to go into it with a healthy mind frame, and be willing to put in the effort and the love that it deserves. Every person should be in that healthy and open hearted mindframe when they're exploring a new relationship so that they'll be able to give it a real shot. You have to risk getting hurt in order to fall in love. I always say that, but when it comes to falling in that deep kind of love that you see in the movies, that passionate, intense, and so utterly consuming kind of love, you have to fully open your heart up. You have to risk a big wound so to speak, in order to fully embrace someone into your soul. 

When it comes to early dating, and meeting someone new, I've always said that there's a great importance in going into those types of situations with an open heart, but cautiously. But, once you decide to explore a relationship, having taken the dating period to the next level, it's important to open your heart up even more. You need to open your heart even more than when you were dating so that you may fully get to know the person, see if you're the best possible match, and be able to tell whether or not you should move forward together. The only way to truly give new relationships a real chance is to open your heart up so that you can fall crazy in love with the person. When you risk gaining something so pure, so good, so true, and with all of the potential of being an everlasting love, and possibly even your spouse to be, you have to be willing to put it all out there so to speak, and risk getting hurt. 

Remember, during the early dating period, you need to have an open heart, be emotionally available, and risk getting hurt just a little, but your heart must be open. As well, I can't stress enough the importance of going into new situations with an open heart, but during early dating, you need to go in cautiously as well. You need to open up your heart just enough to have a chance at falling in love, and in order to do that, you must risk getting hurt just a little. But, when you choose to get into a new relationship, you have to take it to the next level, in order to truly fall in love, truly get to know if you're the best possible match for one another, and in order to do so, you have to risk getting hurt even more so than during the dating period.