The following is a contributor article by Neer Tiwari: Is snoring ruining your relationship? Though this may seem like a w...
Saturday, April 2, 2016
5 Reasons He Only Wants You When He Can't Have You
When someone is really into you, they'll do anything that they can to get you. Not only that, but when a guy really wants you, nothing will stop him or get in the way in order to attain you, and make you his. When a guy is into a girl, he'll fight for her, and stop at nothing until he wins her love. He'll be willing to put in the work if it takes it, and lack of effort won't be an issue. When a guy really wants to be with a girl, there won't be endless excuses as to why he can't, or can't yet. When a man isn't all that into a woman, he'll give her excuses, and different reasons as to why they can't be together. Having said this, there are some guys that will only value and appreciate a girl when she's not an option.
Many times it takes a couple to literally break up, before a man realizes the loss of what he had. He might even see her move onto the next person, seeing her happy, and then suddenly realizes that he made a mistake. It's important for people to realize that those types of actions are not only messed up, but they're toxic. When someone wants what they can't have, there's a bigger root to the problem than simply wanting what's unattainable. It's important to recognize that if a person only wants someone when they're unavailable, when they can no longer have them, or even when there's such an intense chase that it makes them seem more desirable, they're likely emotionally unavailable or disconnected in some way.
If you want to know what men really want and are looking for in a woman, it could be many things. But at the end of the day, when a guy really wants to be with a girl, he doesn't risk losing her. It's important to recognize that when someone is emotionally unavailable and you start to see the signs, end the relationship or simply stop dating them, and right away. Don't waste your time, effort, or love on a person that isn't ready. You can't fix someone that's emotionally unavailable. Only they can fix themselves by recognizing that they have a problem, and then working on healing it.
Here's the list:
1. Emotionally Unavailable
He's emotionally unavailable. This is the biggest reason that he only wants you when you're unavailable or when he can't have you. Perhaps he just recently got out of a relationship, still has wounds, or isn't over his ex. His heart isn't open to falling in love.
2. Addicted to the Chase
He's addicted to the chase. Once he catches you, he's achieved his goal, and the chase is over so he no longer wants you, and he moves onto the next. He gets a thrill and loves the adrenalin of the chase. When the chase is over, and he catches his prey, he's out.
3. He's Not That Into You
Perhaps he has many other options, and isn't viewing you as number one. He might even view you as a rebound girl or a flavour of the week so to speak. Either he doesn't have his priorities straight, or he doesn't view you as a priority. Either way, he's not truly interested in you.
4. He Doesn't Appreciate You
When someone really loves you, they don't play games with you or your feelings. Showing someone that you love and appreciate them is everything in a healthy relationship. If someone is playing games with you by acting as if you're too available all of the time, then they're the one with the issue. The truth is, couples should never have to play games with each other in order to get what they want or to have the advantage in a relationship. But, if you're at the point in your relationship where you're crazy about each other, can't let go, and want to make him start appreciating you more, let him know how you feel. If that doesn't work, turn the tables, and make yourself busy by doing your own thing. In other words, don't be so available or at his beck and call, but instead, do your own thing, and let him come to you. You have a choice to do that or leave, if telling him how you feel didn't get the response that you hoped for.
5. He Fears Losing You
He figures that you aren't going anywhere when you're always available, and around all of the time. Perhaps this goes back to him not appreciating you when he should. Either way, he only wants you when he can't have you, because the second that he fears the loss of you, he steps up his game, and suddenly seems more interested. He only wants you when he's afraid that he's gonna lose you.
One last thing...
After having written this, I want everyone to be aware that if someone only wants to be with someone else when they're unavailable, it's a big sign of immaturity, and emotional unavailability. The bottom line is that they're emotionally unavailable, and obviously not ready for a real commitment. At least, not a healthy one. You should be with someone who appreciates you, values you and your time as a person, and someone that will recognize what a great catch you are. Just because a girl or a guy is available to someone, it doesn't mean that they're desperate or that other people wouldn't jump at the chance at being with them in a heartbeat. You should appreciate what you have and who you're with while you have them, and not only after they're gone.
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