Saturday, August 29, 2015

Are You Afraid to Fall in Love?

So you're finally on the market again and ready to date. There's only one problem, you feel scared. What are you scared of? Well, you're scared of getting hurt again. You're scared of falling in love with someone and having it end in another heartache. You're scared of developing feelings for someone and then breaking up all over again. What you need to realize is that being scared is going to put a pause on you going forward with anyone. You can't fall in love when you're scared. Not really, at least. You can start to develop feelings for someone, but it won't get very far when you're scared. True though, with time your heart may open up more and your scared feelings may dissipate. But, who knows how long that will take! I wrote this article for people that are afraid or know someone that's afraid to fall in love and risk getting hurt.

Everyone's had a broken heart at some point in time. When you start dating with hopes to go into a new relationship, you need to have an open heart. As well as having an open heart, you also don't want to bring in any baggage from your previous relationships. It's important to have an open heart so that you can fall in love again. If your heart's not open, there's no chance of you falling in love. Many of us have been hurt from previous relationships and despite having time to heal from them, there are still traces of residual pain and heartache. When we've been hurt before or still have some pain in our hearts, despite having had time to heal, it can make us scared to let anyone in again emotionally. When you're scared, the relationship has no chance of going anywhere, because you're not letting anyone see the real you or get too close to you. What people are going to fall in love with is the real you. So you have to let them see who you really are and what you're really all about. I don't believe in going into new situations with a guard or an emotional wall up to protect you. Being cautious is not having any type of emotional wall up. It's merely keeping your eyes open for any signs of the person not having mutual feelings. It's important to be on same page as the other person and to make sure that they're developing feelings for you as well. 

The truth is, there's only one way to go about dating someone new and starting a new relationship. You have to go into each new situation with an open heart and with caution. The keyword here is caution. You need to teach yourself not to be scared, but be cautious. When you're cautious, you're aware that the relationship could take a bad turn and end up in a break up. When you're cautious, you realize that your heart must be open, but there are no guarantees that it will work out. It's never good to be paranoid that things won't work out in a new relationship. But, being cautious is a way of protecting yourself just enough so that you won't experience too much pain, if things don't work out. In order to fall in love, you have to risk getting hurt. You have to risk going through some pain and heartache if it doesn't work out. 

When dating someone new or starting a new relationship, you should always try to be optimistic and have a positive outlook. You should try to be a very glass is half full type of person. You should be happy and excited about exploring a new situation with someone brand new. A new relationship has all of the promise to become everything that you're looking for. You just have to give it a real chance. To give it a real chance, you have to have an open heart. To have an open heart, without risking all of your feelings, you should be cautious. To be cautious, you have to go at a pace that's comfortable for you, where you see that the other person is a really good match, and they feel the same way about you. So to those people who have found that special person and are hoping to start something new with them, remember that you have a blank, clean slate, and that you need to go into this new situation cautiously, but with an open heart